Monthly Archives

September 2011

Month of fun: Days 10-14

September 14, 2011

MOVING. That is all I have been doing lately. Every waking moment has been consumed by this great migration: Sorting, packing, hauling, lifting, loading, unpacking, cleaning. And there couldn’t be a worse time to relocate in the desert. I felt like I could ignite at any second.

I’m also on a debt diet, trying to rein in my spending while I save up money for bigger projects and investments. So I haven’t made any wacky, frivolous purchases.

On top of that, I’m doing a wheat-free, sugar-free, alcohol-free, low-fat, low-cal (and many other hyphenated words) detox right now. So I couldn’t even crack open a cold beer on moving day, toast the new apartment with a glass of bubbly or indulge in some well-deserved dark chocolate. Hrumph.

Put all of that together, and you don’t have a lot of room for fun — not even when you’re forcing it. I have been grumpy and snippy and sweaty for almost a week straight. It’s a wonder I’m still married.

Day 10

Lowlight: Packing. How is it possible to spend one year of my life with just a backpack, yet have an entire apartment crammed full of stuff? Where did it all come from? Why am I putting it in boxes?

Highlight: The final night in our tiny, smelly apartment! I celebrated by finally using the Lush Comforter bubble bar that I’ve been saving for a special occasion. It smells like blackcurrant and magically turns the bath water pleasantly purple with stacks of creamy bubbles. It’s like submerging yourself in straight-up Prozac.

 

Day 11

Lowlight: Instead of hiring a moving van, The Husband and I opted to make hundreds of trips back and forth in his Honda Civic hatchback. This is officially the last time I will ever follow-through on one of our “bright” ideas.

Highlight: Our friends Shad and Xochitl came over with their SUV to give us a hand with the big stuff. With the mattress, we simply stuck it on top of the vehicle. No rope, because we’re badasses like that. (Also because we didn’t have any rope.) Then we rolled down the windows and desperately clung to the bed as we rolled through town. Some people might call that “illegal.” I call it “minimalist.”

Here’s Xochitl, my partner in crime.

 

Day 12

Lowlight: All the stuff that goes along with moving, including piles of boxes, the inability to locate anything important and two severely traumatized pets who wouldn’t come out from under the bed.

Highlight: First full day in the new place! I unpacked enough kitchen supplies to make a huge batch of soup, so the apartment would smell like a home. The scent also lured in a couple of neighbors who wanted to find out what I was cooking.

 

Day 13

Lowlight: Cleaning the old apartment. Cleaning until my nails were stripped and my skin began flaking off. Cleaning until I was pale and withered.

Apparently, what sunlight does to vampires, that’s what cleaning does to me.

Highlight: Taking my dog, Lemon, out for a walk in the thunderstorm. I hate that I’m one of those people who puts her dog in a raincoat, but alas, I am — much to the delight of my cooing, giggling neighbors.

Here’s an old photo of Lemon in her action fleece. (She doesn’t hang around long enough in the rain for a photo.)

 

Day 14

Lowlight: More cleaning in an effort to get our deposit back. I personally consider the deposit to be a renter’s tax, so I dismiss it as a lost cause. I know it’s rare to actually receive the full amount back, and if you believe that time is more important than money (which I do), then why waste it on scrubbing down an old space?

The Husband, however, would have Magic Erasers surgically implanted on his hands if he could. He’d be Edward MagicEraserHands, and he’d star in the lamest Tim Burton movie ever. He believes in the deposit, and he is willing to fight for it.

So we cleaned. And cleaned. And I think we left the place in better condition than when we moved in.

Highlight: Sat on the patio of my new home and savored a cup of steamy hot tea. Home sweet home at last.

 

Month of fun: Day 9

September 9, 2011

Today I was stopped at a traffic light in downtown Palm Springs when a vehicle pulled up next to me. The driver made a halfhearted and awkward attempt to parallel park. She eventually gave up, leaving the car jacked against the curb like a knife sticking out of a ribcage.

This girl got out of the car, growled with feigned ferocity, then slammed the door shut. The skinny boy in the passenger seat mimicked her, snarl and all.

Oh. My. Goth.

They were a couple of goth kids and — I know how much they would hate me for saying this — they were totally adorable. They had it all: The slightly bored and glum look. Leather arm cuffs and torn fishnets. Wispy black hair, teased and sprayed into sculptural swans. Thick black eyeliner, like piped frosting on a morbid cupcake.

It was as if I’d ordered them right out of the Hot Topic catalog.

If only they’d had a Walkman and a couple of Cure tapes, they could have been dressed like me for Halloween. Or, you know, any Tuesday of my sophomore year in high school.

I loved them. I wanted to adopt them. It’s easy to pull off boho or surfer or preppy chic in the California desert. But dedicating yourself to a face full of powdery pancake makeup when it’s 110 degrees and your hair gel is melting into your eyes? Well, that requires enormous devotion to self-expression, and I gotta admire that.

As for me, I’m not so goth these days. (Or what are the kids calling it now? Emo?)

For instance, my fun thing for the day was curling up with my guilty pleasure/Sookie Stackhouse book.

 

Yeah, it’s vampires, but it’s a far cry from when I used to dress in black, growl at the world and scare all the old people at the mall. Sometimes I really do miss that corseted, blood-red-fingernailed, melancholy part of me.

Turns out I’m not too far gone, though. As my lil’ goths crossed the road in front of my car, I gave them a snarl of solidarity. Keep on despairin’ in the free world!

Month of fun: Day 8

September 8, 2011

When I was little, I put swimming pools in the same category as tiaras and castles. Pretty, but completely unattainable. And whenever I saw a TV show where the kids had a pool at school, forget it — that was as fictional as Charlie’s Chocolate Factory.

The only pool I knew was at the Huber Heights YMCA, a dangerous bike ride away from where I lived. The pool was so thick with kids and crumpled Funyuns packages, you could barely see the water. Lusty, greasy teenagers humped against the metal bars that lined the stairs. The smell of urine overwhelmed the chlorine.

My parents sacrificed a lot to get me a summer membership, so I went, albeit reluctantly. It’s not that I didn’t like to swim. I just didn’t like to swim there.

So now I consider it the ultimate luxury to live in a place with a swimming pool — clean and hump-free! — where I can cannonball, dive and doggy paddle 365 days a year.

 

It is not my swimming pool, but it feels like it is. Nobody in the complex really uses it. Maybe for people who grew up with sunshine and swimming pools, the shockingly teal ribbon has faded into the background. Maybe it seems too boring and familiar. Maybe they don’t remember the sheer joy that comes from floating on your back, drifting, watching the palm trees.

 

For me, it’s a baptism. The pool is my River Jordan. It’s like getting a slippery new skin.

The Husband doesn’t understand. He doesn’t like doing laps. He doesn’t like splashing around. He doesn’t even like floating. Whenever I coerce him into the pool, he just stands there and looks at me expectantly, like “Now what?” Until I hit him over the head with a pool noodle.

 

Today, after packing and hauling boxes over to the new apartment, just when I thought I couldn’t move another muscle, I jumped into the pool and was instantly reborn.

 

Month of fun: Day 7

September 7, 2011

My husband and I picked up the keys to our new apartment. Whee!

 

In our whole 8-year relationship, this is the first time we’ve moved into a place together.

First, he moved into my apartment in Cincinnati. Then I ended up moving to Palm Springs by myself, and he had to stay behind for a while. And when I went on my trip, he moved into a one-bedroom bachelor pad.

But this? This is our little nest.

Month of fun: Day 6

September 6, 2011

I mailed my old iPod to Nepal!

My friend Jehan works at an orphanage with some of the most wonderful kids in Kathmandu — and those kids love to boogie to Bollywood tunes. When Jehan put out a call for a couple of iPods to help entertain the kids, I had just the thing for the job.

Nepal, meet my old mini, Bootsy.

 

 

I just love doing something fun for someone else, and I cannot wait to see photos of the kids shaking their groove thangs, Bollywood-style.

Now here’s a great tune for the rest of you.